The Farmer & Dale Ch. 07
Keywords: The, &, 07, Farmer, Dale, Ch.,
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He sighed, and cursed softly as he felt his cock stir.
Since Irene's death he'd not had an erection, had not experienced desire of any kind except one. The overwhelming desire to be with her. It wasn't that he contemplated suicide. That was something he would never do, it was just that he dreamed of things being as they had been before the accident. This world that he was left in, seemed empty. He felt desperately alone, even when he was surrounded by the love of his children and grandchildren.
But now there was this burgeoning desire for Steven and James. He squeezed his eyes tightly, burying his face in his hands. How could he even contemplate such a thing? His beloved Irene was gone. How could he possibly consider finding happiness, or even physical pleasure without her? Even now, his body was betraying him; his cock stiffened as that scene with Steven and James replayed in his head.
In the darkness behind his closed lids, his thoughts strayed from impression to impression. The scent of them, each was different yet equally provocative. James had been warm from the sun, his scent stronger, musky male mixed with sunlight and suntan lotion. Steven's scent was more subtle, his fresh, clean yet masculine aroma had risen subtly with the warmth his body exuded. It aroused Gerald senses, drawing him into the past, to a place and time that he had reluctantly put behind him.
And when they touched him, dear God, had anything ever been so welcome? For those fleeting moments the pain receded, the desperate anguish diminished so far that he no longer felt like a helpless child, cowering in the dark, crying for the one person who would make it all better. Irene, who could not be there, who would never be there again.
He dropped his hands from his face and looked down the length of his body. He stared at his erection as though it were some unfamiliar and alien part of himself, something he'd never seen before and certainly nothing he welcomed. Slowly his hand moved down and he wrapped his fingers around himself. A groan burst from his throat as pleasure shuddered down his spine. His breath began to speed, his hand moved, slowly stroking.
"Ah God!" he groaned.
Images of Steven, of their past, appeared in his mind, being acted out like a play on a stage. His perspective shifted to the present, shifted to include James. The thoughts that filled his head were shocking in their conception, stunning for the sheer sensuality and daring of them. Another groan was torn from his throat. He felt the familiar tingling buildup that told him he was still very much a man.
Suddenly, wrapped in the approaching pleasure came another image. An image of Irene as she moved beneath him, welcoming every pounding thrust of his cock. Irene, Steven, James. Each face vied for supremacy in his mind. With an anguished wail, Gerald pivoted and cut the flow of hot water. The shock of the shower spray, now icy cold, sliced through the images, shredding them like so much tissue paper. His lust disappeared as fast as his erection. Shaking and shivering with cold, he shut off the water completely.
Shuddering, he stood frozen for a few seconds, his eyes wide, unseeing, as he fought to hold all his wildly careening emotions at bay. At last he stepped slowly from the shower, and taking a towel he began to dry himself, his expression mirroring the blank state of mind he achieved. Automatically, he returned to the bedroom and dressed. He sat on the edge of the bed, debating whether to wear shoes and socks. The only evidence of his buried agitation was the occasional twitching of his fingers as they sought to tighten into fists.
* * *
James had set the dining room table, lighting some candles to enhance the atmosphere. Gerald had rejoined them and volunteered to help. Steven had set him to tossing the dressing into the salad. They had exchanged several significant looks over Gerald's withdrawn and subdued mood; he wasn't making the slightest effort to put on a show of normalcy.
The food was carried into the dining room and they began their meal. James and Steven carried the conversation; Gerald would not speak unless a question was directed his way. He played with the food on his plate, eating very little. Steven and James' own appetites were affected until the food seemed some tasteless mass that dared them to consume it.
Steven's nerves, stretched taut, hit the breaking point. He reached out and covered one of Gerald's hands with his own.
"Don't," Gerald told him without making eye contact.
"Don't what?" Steven asked.
"Don't touch me."Gerald elaborated, he looked up, his eyes bleak, "You don't have the right to touch me."
"You're right, Gerald, I don't have the right to touch you. I'm just trying to offer you some comfort." Steven told him quietly.
Gerald's face flushed, his eyes taking on a glittering anger, "I know what you're trying to offer. You've got no right," he snapped, "no right to make me feel..."
"What are you feeling Gerald?" James, seeing Steven's face blanch with hurt, decided it was time to intervene.
Gerald turned his anger on James, "And you, you're just as guilty. Trying to make me betray Irene."
"Is that what you'd be doing, Gerald? Did Irene tell you that she expected you to stay celibate and alone?" he demanded. Gerald didn't answer and James repeated sharply, "Did she?"
Gerald flinched, tears sparkling in his eyes. He shook his head, "We made a pact," he swallowed hard, tears clogging his throat, "We agreed that if something happened to either of us, the other would go on living."
James nodded, "That was good. Irene is very wise, she loves you so much. Did you notice that I said she loves you, present tense?"
Gerald nodded.
"That's because she's still with you, Gerald. She's an integral part of you and always will be. You do know that don't you?" James questioned.
Gerald nodded again.
"Do you think Steven and I would ever want to change that, that we would try to take that from you?"
He shook his head, tears starting down his cheeks. He turned to Steven, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." he whispered desperately.
Steven stood and went to Gerald, who buried his face in his midriff. Anguished sobs wracked his body. James moved in behind him and they held him between them, James massaging his shoulders and back as Steven murmured words of comfort, his hand sliding through the thick strands of Gerald's hair. Eventually he quieted. Steven urged him to stand and he and James shepherded Gerald to their room.
Steven steered him into the bathroom, "Why don't you get yourself cleaned up?. There's some aspirin in the medicine cabinet; I think you should take two or three, they'll help you to relax, ok?"
Gerald nodded and with a sigh, went into the bathroom and closed the door.
Steven drifted into James arms and laid his head on his shoulder, "Thank you. I would never have found the words."
James hugged him tightly, "You would have. I've just had all that experience at cross examining people. Gerald was trying to hide from his feelings, and we just had to make him see them."
Steven sighed, "We should go clear the table and clean up."
"You stay here, love. I don't think he should be left alone right now."
Steven began to protest.
"Hush, don't fuss. I'm only going to throw everything in the fridge, rinse the dishes and load the dishwasher. It won't take me long. Now do as I say." he gave Steven's ass a light swat.
Steven smiled, "I just love it when you go all alpha male on me."
James chuckled, "Too bad I can't show you just how alpha I'm feeling right now," he sobered, "Are we keeping Gerald with us tonight?"
"I'm going to try, is that all right?"
"Of course, but you should make it clear that nothing is expected of him." James instructed, "I don't think he's ready for that yet, if ever."
Steven agreed. James left to take care of the cleanup. Steven sat on the bed and listened for Gerald's movements. He heard the toilet flush and the water in the sink running for a bit. A few minutes later, Gerald emerged from the bathroom.
His face was freshly washed, his eyes and lips were still slightly puffy from his tears, but he looked much more serene and in control. He looked at Steven almost shyly, a hesitant smile trying to make its appearance.
Steven smiled in return and went to Gerald, taking him in his arms. He sighed, laying his head on Steven's shoulder as he slowly rubbed his back. Gerald could feel the tension drain away as exhaustion swept in.
"Ok now?" Steven asked.
"Yes." Gerald admitted quietly. He hadn't felt so at ease in months, it was a relief to drop his guard and release the pain that had imprisoned his heart.
"Gerald, we want you to sleep with us tonight." Steven could feel Gerald grow tense in his arms, "We don't expect anything from you, now or ever. If something happens or not, it's your decision, but we want you with us, neither one of us wants you to be alone."
Gerald pulled away feeling suddenly shy as butterflies took wing in his stomach, "Could we just sleep? I hate sleeping alone." he whispered.
"Of course we can. Why don't you get undressed and get in bed, James is doing a quick cleanup in the kitchen and I'm going to make use of the bathroom for a few minutes."
Gerald nodded and started undressing, pulling his polo shirt over his head. He emerged from under it to see the bathroom door close as Steven went in to get ready for bed. Gerald was feeling very strange, excited, yet apprehensive, all underscored by a weariness that dragged at him unmercifully. He took off his shorts and folded them and his shirt, laying them neatly over a chair. He usually slept nude and debated for a moment then decided to keep his briefs. They gave him a feeling of security, even though he knew that neither Steven or James would try to force anything from him.
Neither drained nor sated, I yank my length out of him. A dollop of sperm escapes, but no more. He wants my sperm to percolate and stew in him, merge with his flesh.
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Keywords: The, &, 07, Farmer, Dale, Ch.,